10. Dr. Dre
The brolic L.A. king spends most of his time in either the studio or the gym. As the strong-and-silent heavy in a psychedelic bruiser stable, he’d be fucking terrifying.
9. Joe Budden
A master instigator, Joe makes it very easy to hate him while making it perfectly clear he doesn’t really want the smoke. Perfect heel manager shit. (Cry your Hart out, Jimmy.)
8. Lupe Fiasco
While Lupe Fiasco went from pensive lyricist with a skateboard in his Goyard bag to straight-up Twitterlectual, he’s always been a martial arts head. Scroll his timelines to catch him slicing up melons with katanas or firing off a few rounds into the heads of poor dummies. In the WWE, he’d be a smart, melanated, version of “The Lethal Weapon” Steve Blackman — kick, pushing his way to victory. Cue the lasers.
7. Megan Thee Stallion
This is not based on her outfits, which have been compared to WWE tights (they’re obviously a nod to Texan garb, but whatevs). It is, however, based on the fact that she talks slick and legitimately looks like she’ll beat your ass and mine.
6. Lil Nas X
Zany colors. Guttural shouting. Nonstop shit talk. Not even The Rock could smell what 6ix9ine is cooking.
4. Rick Ross
Rozay is already seen shirtless more often than some pro wrestlers. And only the Undertaker has a longer history of keeping kayfabe despite the threadbare believability of their characters. Uhnnh!
3. Cardi B and Offset (Tag Team)
Cardi’s wrasslin’ debut — getting tangled up with Nicki Minaj’s security at the Met Gala — was impressive. But nothing solidified her WWE potential more than power-couple teammate Offset flying off the top rope with a superman punch against a hatin’-ass drink tosser a couple of months back. Andrade and Zelina could never.
Wale ain’t really scaring nobody on the street but the WWE fanatic has got a mind for the ring that would give him an upper hand. He’s like the (recently unretired) Edge: A cat who looks like a soccer dad right up until the bell rings. Then, one wrong move and it’s 1–2–3.