Photo Illustration: Save As/Medium; Source: Warner Bros via Hbo Max
8. Robot Chicken (from ‘Robot Chicken’)
Good luck finding the edible portions of this cyborg monstrosity that was revived and Frankensteined after becoming highway roadkill. Neither appetizing nor worth the effort.
7. Chicken (from ‘Cow and Chicken’)
This cartoon character just looked scrawny, zooted out of his mind, and most definitely not organic. (But we see you, Cow!)
6–5. Chicken Little and Egghead Jr. (tie)
It’s hard not to imagine either of these big-headed, stubby-legged chicks glazed and twirling on a rotisserie rack.
4. Angry Chicken (from ‘Family Guy’)
You better know how to fight if you dare to even think about getting a taste of this belligerent-ass bird that’s perpetually brawling with Peter Griffin. Truth is, after all of that tenderizing, the meat would probably fall right off the bone.
3. Blaziken (from ‘Pokémon’)
The great thing about Blaziken being a fire-type Pokémon is that he’s already cooking — you’ve just gotta get him in the damn poké ball. So much for free range.
2. Chicken Boo
Honestly, we’ve been daydreaming about this six-foot fowl ever since Animaniacs first popped off in the ’90s.
1. Foghorn Leghorn
This oversized rooster with a Southern accent definitely looks pumped up on some kind of growth hormone — which is to say, there’d be plenty to go around at dinnertime. Plus, he’d probably banter and sing a bit while the oven heats up. Sure, the songs would be borderline racist, but that’s just one fewer giant racist chicken to worry about.
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