The Moment Megan Thee Stallion Learned That People Are Trash
Photo: Johnny Nunez/Getty Images

The Moment Megan Thee Stallion Learned That People Are Trash

From misogyny to transphobia to…

Megan Thee Stallion reminds me of home — like a sausage, cheese, and jalapeño kolache from Shipley Do-Nuts (a compliment of the highest order) or an oppressive amount of humidity (seriously). If you’re from Houston, you know. Everything about her feels familiar, from the part of town she grew up in to the quality that has since made her an ever-rising star, like the other H-Town hottie in my life, Beyoncé: She’s genuinely nice and doesn’t really fuck with anyone. All Megan does is rap better than most, shake that ass to mesmerizing levels no matter where you swing on the Kinsey Scale, and do anything else she thinks might make for a good time.

How could you be mean to someone who’s smiling all the time? She is harmless even if you don’t enjoy her music. As a man of taste, however, I am a “Hottie” and have been ever since someone put me on to “Pull Up Late” from her Make It Hot mixtape. Understanding that, and having heard that and the Tina Snow mixtape, you can understand why, when it comes to making fun of the H-Town hottie after being shot twice in the foot, my position is simple: Fuck all y’all.

That includes those near and dear to me. You earned it. Accept it and move on.

For those distracted by anything else happening in 2020, a recap: Earlier this month, after reports emerged of Megan suffering a wound from broken glass in the aftermath of a party at Kylie Jenner’s house, she set the record straight on Instagram. “I suffered gunshot wounds as a result of a crime that was committed against me,” she wrote, “and done with the intention to physically harm me.” She went on to share that she had undergone surgery to remove bullets and was anticipating to make a full recovery.

I understand that people can find the humor in anything. I write about my life in my books, and I happen to find humor in my pain. But that’s my pain. Not someone else’s. Megan Thee Stallion’s pain from being shot is not yours for mocking.

But Megan also used the post to counter a report from TMZ that she had been arrested at the same time that Tory Lanez was arrested on a gun charge; in reality, she said, the police had driven her to the hospital for treatment. “This whole experience was an eye opener and a blessing in disguise,” she wrote as a conclusion. “I hate that it took this experience for me to learn how to protect my energy.”

At the time, all of this felt confusing as shit. It’s still confusing. But being nosey and stuck at home like not enough of you are, I read “the blogs” — and saw a video from YouTuber Tasha K alleging that Stallion and Lanez had been secretly dating for eight months. On the night of the shooting, she claimed, Meg had ended the relationship with Lanez. (There was also something about Kylie Jenner, but once again, I implore all Black people of all backgrounds with even the most marginal level of fame to beware those women and their inflated asses — besides Kourtney. How many more of our folks have to fall around that family for the rest of us to wise up?)

Regardless of the veracity of what’s coming from the rumor mill, we know the underlying issue: Megan is believed to have been shot by Tory Lanez following an argument. Circumstantial evidence isn’t kind here: Tory Lanez is no stranger to rumors involving anger and abuse.

Ultimately, it’s Megan’s choice to reveal anything more about what happened to her, but in the meanwhile, the basic fact is that a woman was shot. And as soon as that had been established, men started cracking jokes on social media. Plenty of regular people piled on, but they were egged on by Megan’s celebrity peers. 50 Cent, who I wish would focus more on producing television shows and less on internet trolling, posted a meme that turned her into Ricky from Boyz n the Hood. It wasn’t just men: Draya Michele cracked a joke about Meg’s shooting.

How any of you goofy motherfuckers find that funny is beyond me. During a plague, depression, and race war! Have you no souls at all?

Draya Michele has since apologized — twice — for her remarks. As has Chrissy Teigen for an ill-timed, if unrelated, joke. Even 50, who by my math hasn’t apologized since ever, issued a mea culpa.

Cam’ron hasn’t, but he owes an apology to both Megan and the trans community for the transphobic meme he posted about Tory allegedly shooting Megan. For the umpteenth time, trans women are women; insulting cis women by calling them trans only serves to highlight that you’re a fool and a danger. I appreciate Cam’ron for the memories and boost to the color pink, but this man needs to grow up.

Not all men in hip-hop have been terrible. Wale, who has collaborated with Megan, has publicized his support. You’d think all the other men who have worked with Megan, praised her as a rapper, or publicly lusted after her could at least offer her the same courtesy, no?

I understand that people can find the humor in anything. I write about my life in my books, and I happen to find humor in my pain. But that’s my pain. Not someone else’s. Megan Thee Stallion’s pain from being shot is not yours for mocking.

Some might still dismiss these “jokes” as humor gone awry, but none of that undoes the cruelty that’s been aimed at Megan since she gained a national following. It was only last year when I wrote about the awful people on the internet trying to police the way Megan Thee Stallion grieved the death of her own mother (more than once). She couldn’t grieve her mom correctly. Now she can’t get shot without being ridiculed. Had she died, would that have been funny, too?

As Megan tweeted herself, this is how Black women are treated. And it has to stop.

Not to get all churchy on y’all, but in recent months I’ve integrated gospel music with my smoke sessions (who knew saints and sativa could slap so well together?), so here goes: If I were Noah and you fools who made fun of Megan needed me for a life raft, you’d be straight out of luck on a miracle. I hate to be cruel, but y’all started this.

I want our people — specifically our men — to be bigger than this. To break the habit of debasing and degrading Black women. I don’t pretend to be perfect, but something I try to do every single day of my life is be better than I was the day before. So, in the middle of this imperialist empire’s increasingly embarrassingly downward spiral, I encourage each and every one of you who thinks Megan Thee Stallion being shot by a man is hilarious to take this opportunity to figure out how to be less of an asshole.

Now that she’s back online, you might have your chance.

What made me both angry and sad about watching this was that even when she is the victim, Megan felt compelled to explain that she did nothing to provoke being shot.

“I didn’t put my hands on nobody,” she said. “I didn’t deserve to get shot.”

As she said herself, Megan was shot in both of her feet. Her alleged shooter is a fellow artist and entertainer, so he knows how important the use of our feet is to any human being, much less an entertainer. That is the exact type of shit a bitch-ass abuser would do.

People of decency responded to a woman in obvious pain by offering the love and support she clearly needed. But there were some sadistic people online who saw that responded with tweet after tweet after tweet accusing her of “playing the victim.”

We are supposed to be there for women — and in this case, survivors — not kick them when they are down, not ridicule them when they’re the victim of violence. Megan may learn to protect her energy as some of you pathetic people keep cracking jokes, but I still worry about her and the next Black woman that will be made a similar target.

To those of you who failed Megan Thee Stallion in this moment, I genuinely hope you will take the remainder of this year to wash your hands and stop acting like a waste of the gift of life.

But if not, as I already made clear: Fuck all y’all.