The Bellinger’s have a Father’s Day ritual. At the top of the day, Eric, his two sons Elysha and Eazy, and his father, drive to a local car show that showcases a mix of antique autos and European whips. The three generations, Eric tells me while seated in his family car on a Saturday afternoon, enjoy every moment.
Bellinger, 42, speaks to fatherhood from a place of success. He grew up with an ever-present dad who, he says, has powered his ambition through a never-not-try mantra. And although he didn’t seek instructions from his father on how to raise his own children, his dad’s influence shows up in how he parents.
“I’ma do the things that a father should/ cause ain’t no hood like fatherhood,” sings Bellinger on “Fatherhood,” a melodic tribute to men raising their offspring with all intentions of showing them the right path. The song, Bellinger hopes, will become an other-side-anthem that rubs elbows with Tupac’s ode to Afeni (“Dear Mama”) and Boyz II Men’s “A Song for Mama”. At the very least he’d like the song to be universally loved just as Luther Vandross’s “Dance With My Father.”
“We needed something a little Jodeci-esque,” he jokes.
His self-titled upcoming album is drenched in this level of vulnerability. It exposes the parts of Eric that he has not been willing to share thus far. He says it’s been more difficult to write these songs because it required him to go deep within himself and scribe the trials that got him to the album's triumphant close “Everything is in Order.”
Ultimately, the album becomes another blueprint for his children, a map of the choppy road that led to his success.
LEVEL: Tell me a little bit about growing up in your house with your mother and father.
ERIC BELLINGER: Growing up with my mom and dad shaped me. I get a lot of personality and character traits from my mom, but there's this undertone, this hustle, this determination that comes from my dad.
You had your first kid at 30. Did you reach back to your dad for instructions on how to keep this living-breathing thing alive?
Me and my wife just moved in and we had been living together, but after that point it was like we going to show him we got this. And I don't know why [we took that stance]. We were blessed to have so many people around us. Right now, oh, we have activated the village, but before it was definitely like, we got this.
Before you activated the village, and even after, what has been the hardest part of being a father?
Having to go away and tell them they can’t go with me. A part of me is sick of saying no — there’s a part of me that wants to say “yeah, just come with me.” But I know there's a program in place and a routine that my wife has configured to perfection. I don't want to mess with that plan or that program, but it's really tough to walk out that door and know that they're missing me. It’s tough to hear one of them got in trouble at school today. I think, is it because I'm not there and not able to give him that real manly discipline that they need? I’m not there to put my foot down in a way that has him trembling, nervous, but with love to do the right thing.
Take me back to the origins of the song “Fatherhood.”
I was in the studio with Tony Dixon and Chris Riddick. They just did a lot of the songs with Kelani like “Folded” and SZA’s “Snooze” I was in with them working on Kelani’s music and was like, "Yo guys, this is so magical. We need to cook up for my new album." We decided to come back the next day. She just won the Grammy so that energy was in the room.
[My manager] Lee had an idea like, "Yo, how did it feel when you became a dad? Have you ever written a song? We got a bunch of Mother's Day anthems, but what about the dads?" Lee had been challenging me [to discuss more personal] topics because musically I tend to make songs that are lifestyle music. And she challenged me to make music about my life. The big moments: becoming a dad, how I felt after grieving my mom, crying in front of my wife.
There are many hit records centering motherhood. Why are song on fatherhood less ubiquitous?
There's a stigma on dads not being there — deadbeat dads. It's just so loud that people haven't been bold enough to celebrate the ones that are there. What about the dads that do show up? What about the fathers that put their children first? So I was like, let's make a song that is a proud dad's song that can represent. I love “Dear Mama” and “Mama” by Boyz II Men. I love all those songs but let's do them for the dads so we can add to the list.
Only Luther’s “Dance With My Father” comes to mind.
We got “Dance With My Father,” but I'm trying to get hood. I'm trying to rep for the gang. We out here, we’re tough, we’re manly and we hold it down for our families [laughs].
Talk to me about the chorus on the song.
Ain't no hood like fatherhood, but I also made sure I shouted out the moms. Ain't no hood like motherhood, either.